Broken and Alone
by ShinsengumiWarrior
Summary: Is life worth living? Is life worth living, when the one you loved gave you up to die? Is life worth living, when you're surrounded by people who don't care about you? Yui comes to figure these questions out, after a suppose to be, peaceful walk by herself. She comes to realize that if you're broken, alone and despised by everyone around you, that life is probably not worth living.


Broken and Alone

_I just finished watching 'Diabolik Lovers' God was it good. The only thing that I would've liked is if they all showed their care for her. Even after she stabbed herself they didn't care… it was a little disappointing. This one shot- possibly could be made into a two shot is about her reconsideration of what's going on, and her thoughts on it. I hope you enjoy!~ And it would be awesome if you could R&amp;R, it helps motivate me to write! It would also be nice if someone could tell me if there is confirmation of a season 2, with the Mukami brothers as I am a little confused. It seems like there is another family, as some of the other writers have wrote about them. Is there a different season for them? Anyways enjoy!_

Yui smiled as she walked through the grass, the blades tickling her feet. With every foot step she took, leading away from the life she had built with her '_new_' family. She slightly turned her head, her crimson eyes observing everything. The mansion that she was living in cast a shadow, the sky orange and yellow. She walked in the gloomy shadow until she reached the tree line, the tree tops were the only thing in sight with the temporary sun light.

She turned once again, her eyes looking for any sort of movement. Satisfied that only the grass was swaying with the wind, she looked back over to the trees. She slowly put her head, her only attention on the dirt path. She needed a walk. She needed to think. She didn't know what was down this path, but it couldn't have been worse than what was inside the house. She frowned upon remembering the incident before she left.

She had just barely escaped Ayato, thanking the lord that Reiji was walking by. He reprimanded him for not using his room, as it was impolite to siphon blood in the living room. The side of her lip tilted up, hoping that maybe it was to help her. She then immediately stopped smiling. She sighed, knowing the truth behind the matter. She knew he wasn't doing it for her sake, he just wanted perfection, and she guessed that blood on the sofa wasn't what he had in mind for _'Perfection.' _She drew a sad smile, as she had realized that no one had done anything for her sake since she had been living there. She was hoping that if she tried to be nice to her, that maybe, just maybe that they would warm up to her. But no matter how hard she tried, she was nothing to them. They didn't care about her wellbeing, they only cared about if they had gotten their share of blood when they wanted it.

She stopped her walking, when all of the things they had said came rushing into her head.

"_Mortals, are just containers of human blood."_

"_Does it hurt? You poor thing. All right, I'll make it hurt even more."_

"_Your tears and that look of pain on your face… it does it for me."_

"_What, are you frightened? It's very pale. I bet if I bit it through, it would spurt bright red blood, like a geyser."_

"_You would like beautiful, as a silent corpse. Say, would you like to become a figure right here and now?"_

"_Just be quiet and allow my fangs to enter you."_

These thought's floated in her head, like a nightmare replaying over and over again. She dropped to her knees, her hands holding her head as a futile attempt to make the pain stop. She started trembling, the grip on her head becoming tighter and tighter. She was so focused on her thoughts she didn't even noticed the small tear that produced itself, sliding its way down her cheek. Not that if she had noticed, she would've cared. Her shiny, blonde hair shaking in the same motion as her body. Her grip on her head grew even stronger, until her knuckles were white. The nightmares were replaying faster and faster.

"Please… Stop." Her voice choked out. She tried to think of anything, anything other than those awful vampires. It scared her mentally that they were on her mind in the first place. She didn't understand it, her happy demeanor was replaced with a crying, quivering mess. Why was she acting like this? She felt like all of her bottled up emotions, were coming undone right here in the middle of their own forest, bottled up emotions she didn't realize she had.

She needed to stop, she needed to get up and leave, and pretend like this wasn't happening. She tried to lift her arm, to wipe away the tears that were now coming down her cheeks. But to her surprise and shock it was unresponsive. Her mind went into a flip, trying to do anything to stop this. But what could she do?

She then realized what those vampires had done to her. The truth hit her in the head, hard. She was nothing, to them. She was just a light snack before dinner, or prey that they had the joy of catching. They all took blood whenever they needed it, not caring about the after affects for her. With each bite they took, her positive and happy charisma went crashing down.

They had scarred her, tortured her and broken her down. Her mind repeated what she had just thought. _They had scarred, tortured her and broken her down_. Her crying and trembling stopped. Her body went motionless. Her eyes instantly had lost their shine, the shine that separated her from any normal person.

_Broken. _That was the only word that was in her mind, everything dropped. The replaying of the past immediately stopped. _Broken _it repeated. She was… _Broken. _She then realized, what that had meant. They had won. She had lost. Her fight for survival, and willpower to leave here someday was gone.

The one thing that she had clung to like it was her power source, disappeared leaving the young girl behind. The thought that she would meet with her father again had disappeared.

Her thoughts immediately flashed back to the day she was brought here. She was brought to her own personal Hell. If she had known what was behind that door, she would've ran for her life leaving nothing behind except her muddy foot prints. She should've known that something was weird when her father had told her that there was some distant relatives that she didn't know of. She should've been way more reluctant to leave her father, but of course, the foolish, innocent little girl that was herself only agreed as a chance to meet her new family. Little did she know that by agreeing she was giving up her father, the only thing that she loved.

The thought came back once more. Her father abandoned her. He didn't care that he had brought her to her death. The other side of her mind, the part that was slipping away fought against it. He could not have known. But then again, why would entrust her to them? He must've known something. He was always so cautious. She felt the positive part of her mind slip away. The only logical thing was that he… abandoned her.

He. Abandoned. Her.

He left, not even caring that he was the center of her would. She loved him, with all her heart, only to be repaid with the glory of being a sacrificial bride.

This made her question what she was to him. Was she just some daughter that he didn't want to raise anymore? Was she just a person that he used to love? Was she a nuisance to him, not having the time to take care of her, as it was her Late Mother's duties? Was she just some dead weight that he got rid of the first chance he got?

This questions, instantly started swirling in her mind, weaseling the possibilities into every part of her body. She tried pushing them away, still clinging to the small chance of hope that her father didn't know that he was sacrificing her to a family of thirst vampires.

But her mind started thinking, her thinking, destroying every possible solution that this was all a huge mistake on his part. Every part of her body was entangled in the fact this was all her dad's fault. He abandoned her. And now she was alone, already destined to die by them. Instead of pushing the truth away, she did something that her other self would not have done. She embraced, the truth, the pain, and the heart ache.

Her eyes, opened, crimson eyes scanning the area. She realized, that the night sky was now a dark blue, the stars shining brightly, just like her old eyes used to do when she was talking about something she was fascinated by. She must have had quite the long meltdown if it was already night. She instantly stood up, her school uniform covered with dirt stains.

She smiled realizing, that they were all probably having dinner, most likely furious at her. '_I mean, a mere mortal making them wait! How Dare Me!'_ She giggled at the thought. She stopped thinking something was weird, she tilted her head, curious at the way she giggled. It was different than her usual one. She then shook her head coming into the solution. She didn't care. She didn't care but she knew they were going to come look for her soon.

She turned and instantly started walking deeper into the dark green forest, he shoes tapping with each step she took. As she walked deeper into the forest, most of her thoughts started clearing up. Only one remained. '_I'm broken and alone.' _

She abruptly stopped walking, her already sad frown, deepening. '_Where am I going?' _She didn't have a destination. All she knew was that she didn't want to be with her cursed family anymore. She didn't want to see their faces, grinning at her. Not because they liked her or cared for her, but because they wanted to sink their fangs into her neck and get as much blood as they could, before another brother took their turn. She didn't want to be imprisoned in her room for whatever awaited a 'Sacrificial Bride.' She could already tell from the name that it wasn't pleasant. She wouldn't become their blood supply, she didn't care if she had the finest blood in the world not a drop more would be leaving her body. She wouldn't be their prey, she wouldn't let them have the thrill of chasing her until she collapsed.

She sighed, finally realizing the situation. '_I can't escape. They would catch me, before I got the chance.' _She knew she was wasting precious time, but she wanted to do what was right for her.

But what was right for her? It seemed like every answer she rarely received ended up with another question. It seemed like the only answer, she had was '_Broken and Alone.' _She knew that everyone that had cared for her had disappeared leaving her with blood thirsting, emotionless vampires. A thought then hit her.

"What do I want to achieve?" She whispered to herself. The wind tried answering, for her, blowing up her hair. She smiled at the sky, if only the wind could tell her and give her advice. She then realized it would be easier to make a list of things she didn't want. '_I don't want…_' She smiled faintly. _'I don't want to go back to that house, as it is my imprisonment. I don't want to give them another drop of my blood, as it is my own. I don't want to live with the burden of what my Father did to me, as it is not my fault.'_ Her closed eyes, slowly lit up, her eyes shining. She finally realized what she wanted.

"… I want freedom." Was all she said. She instantaneously started walking, and idea already conjuring in her mind. She didn't know where this path led, it could've led straight back to the dreaded house for all she knew. But something in her instincts told her that this path had something exciting at the end.

She walked using the heal of her shoes first, before the toe as it was the quietest way to walk around. She already knew from past experiences, of exploring the house.

As she was walking, she looked around. The forest was now a gloomy shade of green. The darkness of it almost made it look, like a bad dream, the way the shadows danced around the trees making it appear as if someone was there. She already knew that was a possibility, with six vampires roaming around the grounds. She immediately pushed those depressing thoughts away as she continued her steady pace, with full concentration.

The path seemed to stretch on and on, her bare feet screaming at her to stop. She ignored the feeling, knowing that living with them any longer was worse. As she rounded a corner, her eyes sparkled brightly as she saw a peak up ahead.

She charged at it with full force, losing all ability of her once maintained stealth. Once she was in the clearing her eyes widened. The moon's rays made her eyes sparkle even more, and her hair turn almost silver.

Right in front of her eyes, was a lake, calm and settled as could be. The Moon's light reflected on it, giving it an eerie and mysterious look. It was beautiful and better than anything she could've possibly wished for. She took slow and careful steps, slowly approaching the small dock. She smiled upon not seeing the bottom. It was a good sign that it was pretty deep. She finally said the words that she had thought about before.

"Freedom… through death's design." She whispered.

She stared down at the water before her, knowing it would be that last thing she would ever see aside from the sky. She turned her back to the water, her hair whipping in the wind.

The darkness in the forest unsettled her, feeling that six vampires would jump out stopping her plan of 'Freedom.' She didn't know why, but she felt that if they did, she would be convinced to stop her plan.

She shook her head. She didn't want that. She wanted her desired freedom more than anything. She slowly turned her head back to face the water. The water was calm and peaceful. It was exactly what she wanted for herself.

She looked up at the sky, silently praying to god that she was sorry. Sorry she didn't want to live anymore and that she was giving up on life. Her fingers ran across the cross that was hanging on her neck.

She then instinctively grabbed the cross, pulling it as hard as she could, until the string snapped. She then silently, placed the cross down on the dock. She knew she didn't deserve to have a grave, after taking her own life, but felt it necessary to complete her action. It was also, to show the vampires when they showed up what had happened to her, just in case the waters had already swept her up before they got to see her corpse.

She then turned to face the forest, the wind blowing through her silver hair. She silently, put her heels halfway over the edge.

She knew if she fell in she would die. Even if she had a change of heart, she couldn't live. She would struggle until she ended up at the bottom, cursing at herself for being an idiot, for she did not know how to swim.

But she knew in the bottom of her heart that this is what she wanted. She closed her not wanting to waste any more time, putting more weight on her back. She felt the wind rush up her back and the water embrace her.

As the water pulled the non-resistant girl to the bottom she couldn't help but open her eyes. When she did she was shocked. The water around her looked so peaceful, and relaxing. She saw fish, swimming away, and seaweed dancing at the bottom. She was breathless. She didn't think that her resting place at the bottom of the lake would be as beautiful as this. When she looked up, at sky, she could see the stars and the moon clearly. It looked breath taking through the blue waters. She watched as the stars and the moon became more distant, and she realized she was sinking slowly to the bottom.

She didn't care when her lungs started begging for air. Yui completely ignored them only interested in saying her goodbyes to her father and distant relatives who weren't vampires. Her mind was about to start, when she felt her back hit the bottom. The way the seaweed started tickling her back, reminded her of home. Remembering the foolish nice they had. She started moving her arm, only to have a sharp pain spread across her elbow. She only turned her head, and saw that her elbow had hit a rock. Her eyes followed the blood streams that floated and mixed in with the water. She was about to start her prayers for the second time when her head started to get dizzy, from the lack of oxygen to her head.

Yui knew she had to speed up her good byes. She then quickly closed her eyes ignoring the pounding of her head and the screaming of her lungs. '_Goodbye Dad. I hope that after I die, we will eventually have the ability to have a conversation, there will be a lot I would like to talk to you with. I hope you have a great life, without me. I'm sorry if I was that much of a nuisance, that you left me to die with blood thirsty vampires.'_

The pounding of her head grew worse, and the pain of not being able to breathe was rising with each passing second. She slowly closed her eyes and smiled. _'I also hope that each member of the Sakamaki family, finds eternal peace, happiness… and love.' _She thought, a little surprised at her thought. It was weird, but at the moment… It felt like she could forgive anyone for anything. She closed her eyes fighting, for just one more minute of peace and relaxation.

She slowly opened her eyes, for the last time, and saw something unexpected. She saw her Mother. She saw her beautiful blonde flowing freely through the water, her gorgeous pink lips that must have driven her dad insane and her stunning crimson eyes that reminded her, of her own. She felt all pain leave her body, and felt as if every burden she had once possessed was gone.

She watched as her Mother, reached a hand out to her, beckoning for her to grab it. She smiled, as she gently reached her hand out, slowly closing her heavy eyes for the last time. Her only thought being… '_I'm coming home Mom._'

Little did she know that minutes away from her dying body, was the family, each feeling that a little part of them, something important, was gone.

_There we go! This is my first Diabolik Lovers Fanfiction. I had fun writing this, as I wanted for her to show some emotion. I know that she is out of characters in it, but I feel it was necessary so that she could fully show the matter. I also want to make this into a two-shot (I already have some cute plans for it), but only if you guys say you want it to happen. It will most likely be about them finding her, and having her in a coma. So unless you want it to end here, please R&amp;R!_

_~Shadow_

_January 4, 2015_


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